I don't think I would have gone anywhere if I didn't, but... I am here without recollection, so I can only assume how I'm here. Not in this murder game, but you know. [ Existing as he is rather than existing in how the memory depicts? ] Or perhaps I'm here to atone. That would be funny, wouldn't it?
[ His smile stays quirked, though lopsided. He does think it's humorous? ]
[ Being here in this murder game? Is it not a curse? He doesn't seem that bothered by it, but it's four weeks in already. You have to get used to things. ]
Good memories during this week? That would be nice if they get broadcasted instead, even though I'd rather not have my memories blasted out there.
... The Bearzattis used to be part of the Sicilian mafia, so we have a bad rep even though we've long parted with the criminal lifestyle. It's been a century, to put a number to it.
If I had siblings, they'd have to deal with gossip and prejudice.
Yeah. My family moved around a lot in Italy because of it. Sometimes it got in the way of them getting promotions at their jobs... Or simply we weren't welcome in the neighborhood. I dealt with smaller problems at school. Not a whole lot, but sometimes there will be a kid that would say I'm a criminal like my family.
Got framed for stealing once when really my classmate never actually lost their phone. They just plain lied... But as kids we were all stupid. I don't have much excuse for adults when my friends would invite me over and they'd look at me a certain way. You'd think as an adult, you'd try to support children because they're actually innocent.
[ ... ]
But that was then. It isn't so bad now. I can better ignore gossip and whispers.
Don't you feel that way? You're an athlete. I don't think I nearly have it as bad.
[ Except it is a more intrinsic desire, in the end. It isn't just about modern Capitalism and Status, but we can't always be aware of our low self-esteem. ]
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It's fine. There's not much I can do about it and not much you can do about it.
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[ It makes all the worse when you tell him it's okay to be emotional three days later... ]
But I guess, you feel like that's not really you anyway?
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Right. It's like watching a movie, except... It feels familiar. [ ... ] What we saw may seem tragic, but in a way the ending is desired.
I don't agree with tossing your life away, but there's a want to continue even if it's to make amends.
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With that girl, Morgana. [ He nods. ] Do you know of they—you?—ever met again?
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... I don't know. [ But he smiles, maybe one that is bittersweet. ] But perhaps it's better to never cross paths.
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[ well, that is probably more for jacopo than morgana. and this jacopo doesn't remember so maybe it doesn't matter. ]
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[ At least based on what they saw. ]
I don't think I would have gone anywhere if I didn't, but... I am here without recollection, so I can only assume how I'm here. Not in this murder game, but you know. [ Existing as he is rather than existing in how the memory depicts? ] Or perhaps I'm here to atone. That would be funny, wouldn't it?
[ His smile stays quirked, though lopsided. He does think it's humorous? ]
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[ He's still... unsettled, and sighs. ]
It'd probably be better not to even remember any of that. I hope you at least got some good memories out of it too.
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Then this is all just me being unlucky.
[ Being here in this murder game? Is it not a curse? He doesn't seem that bothered by it, but it's four weeks in already. You have to get used to things. ]
Good memories during this week? That would be nice if they get broadcasted instead, even though I'd rather not have my memories blasted out there.
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[ Poor Rupert and Caiman. ]
Me too, but... some of the ones I've seen aren't that bad. [ ... ] Okay, just one.
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Just one? [ ... ] Did you want to get it off your chest? I won't ask questions after.
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I mean... I'm just a kid who swims.
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[ sorry totty ]
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One of his brothers went and got a haircut that he thought was really cool, but actually looked terrible.
So he and his other brothers agonized over how to tell him, except then a girl showed up and started brutally insulting his hair.
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[ Smiles....... Then ends up laughing. ]
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And Matsuno-san and his two brothers got in trouble with their oldest brothers.
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Having siblings sounds like good entertainment without TV... Sometimes I wish I had one or some, but maybe it's for the best that I don't.
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Why would that be for the best?
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If I had siblings, they'd have to deal with gossip and prejudice.
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Like you have?
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Yeah. My family moved around a lot in Italy because of it. Sometimes it got in the way of them getting promotions at their jobs... Or simply we weren't welcome in the neighborhood. I dealt with smaller problems at school. Not a whole lot, but sometimes there will be a kid that would say I'm a criminal like my family.
Got framed for stealing once when really my classmate never actually lost their phone. They just plain lied... But as kids we were all stupid. I don't have much excuse for adults when my friends would invite me over and they'd look at me a certain way. You'd think as an adult, you'd try to support children because they're actually innocent.
[ ... ]
But that was then. It isn't so bad now. I can better ignore gossip and whispers.
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I'm sorry, Jacopo. It's frustrating... To be treated like that, and to have no way to fix it.
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What's opposite of a criminal? A hard-working and dutiful citizen in society.
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... Feeling like you always have to prove yourself?
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[ Except it is a more intrinsic desire, in the end. It isn't just about modern Capitalism and Status, but we can't always be aware of our low self-esteem. ]
You have to show the world.
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