[ It is a bit of hopelessness but it's also acceptance. ]
The conditions are just a lot of information gathering, but it's with the world I'm from. [ so it's pointless here. ] ..Rather than chosen, it's more that it was given to me. In my original time, I was fated to die. I would have died if I hadn't been given this.
So, it's because of that, I can't really hate what became of my fate. I was able to live longer than I initially would have. I'm.. also the person I am today, because of it. [ Though, a bit sheepish ] Of course, some people here have also helped me grow too.
...It's because I've gone through over one hundred and sixty loops, Rin. I've gone through and seen a lot in those times. I experienced erasure, cold sleep and... even eliminating other people myself.
[ I've been in positions where I've had to eliminate my own friends. ]
[ They know it is, which is why they let it sit for a bit before they nod. ]
..I wasn't always human in my time loops. In some of them, I was an infectee.. Gnosia. That's why I'm.. a bit familiar with the way they think. They care nothing but eliminating humanity. It's something you can't ignore. [ Which is why I always tried to win as quickly as possible as Gnosia. To escape that feeling, to not be infected any longer and move to the next loop. ]
I can keep going because I went through it all to save someone special to me. The person that saved my life, I ended up actually breaking them out of their own sets of time loops before I arrived here. So, knowing that I could save them... I guess that's what made me capable of going through all of it.
It more or less starts over. It's still a new loop, but it's always in the same place-- aboard the ship. The roles are often different, and the people around me aren't always the same outside me and my friend. However, it always ends up being discussions that can last anywhere between a few days to two weeks at most.
It's... [ Complicated. ] Time is complicated. The one that was freed will not be around anymore, no. They'll stay in their Gnosia-free universe while I continue on.
But, I've continued on with another version of them that doesn't have any of those memories, to pass on the key so that... they will later end up becoming the one that escapes the loops. [ it's. it's a mess and they know it. ] The concept of time and looping is hard to wrap your mind around so I'm sure it doesn't make a lot of sense.
... Sorry. It sounds like a lot. [ He shakes his head. ] I guess I understand why you're so capable, at least. And why some of the weird stuff that happens here doesn't phase you.
[ they get it, time is so damn strange in gnosia. ]
It's part of why it was easier to do what I had to if it meant helping my team win. I've had to have the same mindset back in my universe.[ i forgot you placed them both in the pet shop. i guess they're looking around. ] In any case, I'm used to how things are back in my universe, so you don't need to apologize or worry.
[ cute... Setsu will just carry a cat like a baby. ]
No, Alex and Kazuki both were strongly against it. I was willing to if need be, and Jonas was willing to support it- but only because he knew it wasn't going to be something we could get by not doing. [ but, considering the rankings ] ...Well, that's what we thought anyways.
I guess it's pretty naive to think that we could get by without erasing anyone. [ I believed it though. ] But... even if it wasn't possible to save everyone, I don't think I'd blame anyone for playing the game.
... Uh, actually, maybe I would. I hated D a lot for killing me.
It's not wrong to believe that you could get by without playing the game. I can't blame anyone wishing that to be the case. We all come from different experiences after all.
[ Setsu unfortunately is used to this kind of thing so. They rock the cat a little as it falls asleep in their arms. ]
...You didn't deserve to be erased. [ You should have stayed on the living side until the end. ]
[ He goes still for a moment when she says that, hand dropping away from the cockatiel whose name I think is Roberto. ]
Probably not.
[ Gerard said it should've been him. ]
But I wasn't ready to erase anyone. I don't know if I could've done it, so... at least my team was able to get points after I was gone. It worked out for the best.
...It may have worked out for the best, but they thought of you every day. Every week. Ylfa and Haru both would mention you a lot. You were always on their mind, Rin.
[ they will come close enough to take one of his hands with theirs. as they cradle the cat in one arm i guess like a baby. this is a big baby now. ]
Setsu really just peers up at him with a sympathetic look, i forgot he is tall, and they squeeze his hand again noooo ]
You don't need to apologize. [ ... ] But, you're really too hard on yourself, Rin. Part of the reason they were able to push forward and do what they did, it was with you in mind. You do a lot for your team. Probably more than you realize.
[ they press close enough to bump against his side. the cat emits a mrrrup. ] You've done quite a lot for me, after all.
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The conditions are just a lot of information gathering, but it's with the world I'm from. [ so it's pointless here. ] ..Rather than chosen, it's more that it was given to me. In my original time, I was fated to die. I would have died if I hadn't been given this.
So, it's because of that, I can't really hate what became of my fate. I was able to live longer than I initially would have. I'm.. also the person I am today, because of it. [ Though, a bit sheepish ] Of course, some people here have also helped me grow too.
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[ He just wants to clear that first. ]
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No. If I fulfill the conditions, then I'm able to escape the time loops and live normally in the universe I end up in.
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[ so it's not... the worst.
he rubs his head, frowning, ] ... None of that means you should be used to dying. But I'm glad it's keeping you alive, at least.
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...It's because I've gone through over one hundred and sixty loops, Rin. I've gone through and seen a lot in those times. I experienced erasure, cold sleep and... even eliminating other people myself.
[ I've been in positions where I've had to eliminate my own friends. ]
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All because of that Gnosia?
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..I wasn't always human in my time loops. In some of them, I was an infectee.. Gnosia. That's why I'm.. a bit familiar with the way they think. They care nothing but eliminating humanity. It's something you can't ignore. [ Which is why I always tried to win as quickly as possible as Gnosia. To escape that feeling, to not be infected any longer and move to the next loop. ]
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Setsu, I... I had no idea you'd gone through so much. [ He shakes his head. ] One hundred and sixty tries... How do you keep going?
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I can keep going because I went through it all to save someone special to me. The person that saved my life, I ended up actually breaking them out of their own sets of time loops before I arrived here. So, knowing that I could save them... I guess that's what made me capable of going through all of it.
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Will you be together? After you broke them out?
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[ They may be broken out of it, but I am not. ..Oops. ]
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When a loop ends, does it start back where it left off? Or you get sent... somewhere else?
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But, I've continued on with another version of them that doesn't have any of those memories, to pass on the key so that... they will later end up becoming the one that escapes the loops. [ it's. it's a mess and they know it. ] The concept of time and looping is hard to wrap your mind around so I'm sure it doesn't make a lot of sense.
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... Sorry. It sounds like a lot. [ He shakes his head. ] I guess I understand why you're so capable, at least. And why some of the weird stuff that happens here doesn't phase you.
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It's part of why it was easier to do what I had to if it meant helping my team win. I've had to have the same mindset back in my universe.[ i forgot you placed them both in the pet shop. i guess they're looking around. ] In any case, I'm used to how things are back in my universe, so you don't need to apologize or worry.
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pets a cockatiel ]
It's not a matter of needing to... [ they're feelings I can't control ] Your team didn't seem like they wanted to erase anyone to win.
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No, Alex and Kazuki both were strongly against it. I was willing to if need be, and Jonas was willing to support it- but only because he knew it wasn't going to be something we could get by not doing. [ but, considering the rankings ] ...Well, that's what we thought anyways.
[ scratches cat under it's chin. ]
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I guess it's pretty naive to think that we could get by without erasing anyone. [ I believed it though. ] But... even if it wasn't possible to save everyone, I don't think I'd blame anyone for playing the game.
... Uh, actually, maybe I would. I hated D a lot for killing me.
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[ Setsu unfortunately is used to this kind of thing so. They rock the cat a little as it falls asleep in their arms. ]
...You didn't deserve to be erased. [ You should have stayed on the living side until the end. ]
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Probably not.
[ Gerard said it should've been him. ]
But I wasn't ready to erase anyone. I don't know if I could've done it, so... at least my team was able to get points after I was gone. It worked out for the best.
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...It may have worked out for the best, but they thought of you every day. Every week. Ylfa and Haru both would mention you a lot. You were always on their mind, Rin.
[ they will come close enough to take one of his hands with theirs. as they cradle the cat in one arm i guess like a baby. this is a big baby now. ]
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He squeezes their hand in return, even though, they're a better team than I deserve. ]
I know. They're a good team, and they care so much about everyone here... I wish I'd gotten more time with them.
[ But I would've just held them back.
He winces, hearing his own thought echo in his head and rubs his temple. ]
Sorry. You can probably hear me thinking.
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Setsu really just peers up at him with a sympathetic look, i forgot he is tall, and they squeeze his hand again noooo ]
You don't need to apologize. [ ... ] But, you're really too hard on yourself, Rin. Part of the reason they were able to push forward and do what they did, it was with you in mind. You do a lot for your team. Probably more than you realize.
[ they press close enough to bump against his side. the cat emits a mrrrup. ] You've done quite a lot for me, after all.
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