[it's fine i think shenhe threw her phone in the garbage so
she's curled up on a bench in the park disassociating (real). she's holding her toy axe like it's the most important thing in the world and just staring into the middle distance. man.]
[she startles really, really hard when he leans against her, nearly off the bench. but when she realizes who it is, like... vaguely, vaguely, she knows this is rin and this is her captain and he is an axe just like her --
no, wait. no. she's not. he's not.
but he is rin, and her arm shakes and then wraps around him. she turns to hold onto him.]
[ She puts an arm around her and he's so grateful. She always looks after him, takes care of him, is gentle with him despite the wounds carved deep into her.
She's here, and he's so grateful.
He turns to press his head against hers, feeling the ache that exists between them both. ]
[her breath whistles a little when she breathes in, but at least she's breathing.]
You... I. [she starts, and her voice is hoarse. she hasn't used it in a while - she bluescreened somewhere in the middle of the beach battle and just never really recovered from it.] You died.
Yeah. [ He feels strangely numb about it. Like it doesn't even matter. Like his life doesn't matter anymore, not after what he did and what he failed to do.
But he understands that it must've hurt her, so he puts his arms around her too, resting his head atop hers. ]
I'm sorry. I know you tried... I know you wanted to protect us.
[ That's so unbelievably cruel. Who would do such a thing?
He grips the fabric of her shirt. Is any part of her clothing still bloodied, by the way? ]
None of us should have. [ There's a very clear anger in his voice, sadness giving way to frustration. ] You— tried so hard to save us, Shenhe. You even.
[oh, yeah, like. all of it is still bloodied, she never bothered to change out of her clothes. she doesn't seem to mind him holding on, though.]
... You didn't waste it. [she says, after a moment.]
I don't want you to be like me. [she doesn't want him to have killed someone to save the world. that's too much.] It was too late. I had already ruined things. There was no going back.
[a pause.]
You were the only reason that I didn't slaughter everyone in the area, Rin. You did enough.
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she's curled up on a bench in the park disassociating (real). she's holding her toy axe like it's the most important thing in the world and just staring into the middle distance. man.]
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He doesn't have the words to say yet.
So he sits down and leans against her. ]
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no, wait. no. she's not. he's not.
but he is rin, and her arm shakes and then wraps around him. she turns to hold onto him.]
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She's here, and he's so grateful.
He turns to press his head against hers, feeling the ache that exists between them both. ]
I... We made it out.
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You... I. [she starts, and her voice is hoarse. she hasn't used it in a while - she bluescreened somewhere in the middle of the beach battle and just never really recovered from it.] You died.
[she holds him a little more tightly.]
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Yeah. [ He feels strangely numb about it. Like it doesn't even matter. Like his life doesn't matter anymore, not after what he did and what he failed to do.
But he understands that it must've hurt her, so he puts his arms around her too, resting his head atop hers. ]
I'm sorry. I know you tried... I know you wanted to protect us.
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I couldn't. [she says, quietly.] I didn't protect anybody.
[but. she pets at him gently, anyway.] You were brave.
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He doesn't know what happened to leave her like that. ]
... I saw my friend... my sister, they were kids.
I couldn't kill them.
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[she says, after a moment.]
I saw Nahri. Wolfwood. They were children. I wanted to save them. [she brings a hand up, absently, and runs her fingers through his hair.] I didn't.
[...] You shouldn't have had to even consider it.
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He grips the fabric of her shirt. Is any part of her clothing still bloodied, by the way? ]
None of us should have. [ There's a very clear anger in his voice, sadness giving way to frustration. ] You— tried so hard to save us, Shenhe. You even.
[ killed the people you love. ]
But I. I wasted your sacrifice.
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... You didn't waste it. [she says, after a moment.]
I don't want you to be like me. [she doesn't want him to have killed someone to save the world. that's too much.] It was too late. I had already ruined things. There was no going back.
[a pause.]
You were the only reason that I didn't slaughter everyone in the area, Rin. You did enough.
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He feels some of the tightness in his chest ease when she tells him he did enough, a tide of relief that he just barely holds back. ]
... We were set up to do the impossible.
[ It's easier to direct his anger at the situation than himself when Shenhe is on the line, an irritated growl permeating his words. ]
If you ruined the mission, it was because you have a good heart. I know it.
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[she says, softer. she shifts a hand up to tuck his hair behind his ear, without dislodging him.]
You are a good person. You have been from the first day I met you. [...] We will both have to remember that.