[she just. gently links their fingers together, when he does. three things you can feel. three things you can hear, three things you can see. the centering, and what rin tells her, makes it easier to pull her mind back into place, to stop wandering off.]

I do. [want those things. it's hard to figure out how to balance that. it takes other people telling her that it's okay to have conflicting emotions, that it's fine not to just feel everything in a clear-cut, explainable way.]

... I'm not upset to be here. [she says, after a moment.] I have you, and the others. And I am not often lonely anymore, and that means something to me.

[she wipes at her face again.] Before I was here, it was only me.